so...it looks like, the objective value of something in some marketplace, even a figurative one like the marketplace of ideas...
vs what it means to me.
I can get 500 for this used Macbook...but my beloved Winifred made that mark gnawing on it just before she was translated into the heavenly beyond, with a help from the blow of this sturdy poker, and so it means much to me, reminding me of every insult she leveled at me and every humiliation I suffered at her behest, and how I dispatched her...sooo easily...I would not trade this Macbook for all the teakwood in Thailand, or all the guns in America.
and wow, the Counterpoint being part of the mix makes what I was going to write here SO MUCH MORE INTERESTING. How cool.
And it also reverses the thought I had about value. I started out 'the character has no value to himself.' but no no no that's worth. so instead...the character realizes he has value to a great many people for specific things...everyone has a use for him, but that doesn't add up to feeling good about himself or any kind of self-regard because he is being what other people want him to be, not what he wants to be.