Cool. Will keep posting as I go along. If you, or anyone, could review and critique the points, I’d greatly appreciate it. All in an effort to better understand Dramatica and story in general.
EDIT: Oh, and obviously, if anyone wants to participate / help, please do.
Great work, @Jerome. This has been very helpful.
@jhull, regarding MC Growth - Does it relate to the OS (stop cursing the class action), the MC (stop being an overprotective father), or both? And could it be possible that he should start doing something in the OS Throughline and stop doing something else in the MC Throughlines? Thanks.
Because the movie isn’t told in a linear way, I’m having some trouble identifying these, but here’s what I think about:
STORY DRIVER
Inciting Incident - A school bus accident where several children die. (Or could it be Mitchell finding out about it?)
First Act Turn Driver Event - Mitchell arrives to the town to convince the parents to file a class action lawsuit. (Or is it doing some research with the first couple, the Walkers?)
Second Act Turn Driver Event - Mitchell convinces the Otto’s to join the lawsuit.
Third Act Turn Driver Event - Nicole overhears Billy talking with her parents about the lawsuit.
Concluding Event - Nicole lies about what happened.
I definitely think the act turns are the revelations. The story seesaws from one turn to another, going from BAD to GOOD in regards to the lawsuit.
Act 1 > Act 2 Mitchell learns Billy was driving behind the bus. (GOOD!)
Act 2 > Act 3 Mitchell learns Dolores’ excuse for going off the road is she saw something jump in front of her, but we discover she was a seriously distracted driver. (BAD!)
Act 3 > Act 4 Mitchell reveals he’s going to subpoena Billy to testify that Dolores was not a reckless driver. (GOOD!)
Climax Nicole lies (BAD!)
Yes, good point. Specific moments.
I’m not so sure about which specific moments.
Right now we agree on the concluding event. How about the inciting incident? Do you think it’s the accident or Mitchell finding out about it?
The accident. Without the accident, Mitchell doesn’t show up. He’d be doing the same thing somewhere else.
EDIT: So inciting incident (BAD!) to continue the seesaw movement.
Yes, good point. No accident, no Mitchell on this town, but preparing some other lawsuit somewhere else - and also filled with angst.
Re: First Act Turn Driver Event. I don’t think Mitchell learning Billy was driving behind the bus changes the story too much. However, the parents agreeing to join the lawsuit does change things. They could have said no. Now I think it’s the Ottos because we see the moment when they agree to join the lawsuit. Interestingly, the first parents that agree to join are the Walkers, but we never see the moment when they accept, we only find out later when Mitchell is talking with the Ottos.
Looking back on it, I think you’re right. Mitchell makes his case, establishes his position within the context of the lawsuit and the ball starts to roll with the Ottos signing on. The lawsuit is a go. (GOOD!)
Second Act Turn Driver Event: How about the moment when Risa tells Billy that Mitchell is “going to find out who it was” and Billy answers “What are you talking about? It was an accident”. - Bad because Billy would try to convince the parents not to join the lawsuit. This moment leads to the confrontation Mitchell-Billy at the gas station.
Third Act Turn Driver Event: I’m having a little trouble identifying this one. Some candidates:
-Nicole finds out she won’t be able to walk again. - It will change the father-daughter relationship.
-Nicole asks his father to put a lock on the door - it clearly shows their relationship has changed and her final reaction will be to lie.
-Nicole finds out Mitchell is representing them.
-Nichole overhears Billy telling Sam he wants him to drop from the lawsuit. “That’s what we used to do, remember? Help each other. This was a community.”
I like that. Feels more solid that what I had. Also, I think I might be wrong on the GOOD / BAD thing. Need to review the 28 magic scenes from Melanie Anne Phillips http://storymind.com/page455.htm
I think that might work. Again, need to do more homework.
Very nice.
Here’s the next batch for tonight (will try and complete one throughline a night).
OVERALL STORY POINTS
Domain: Situation: Townspeople are overwhelmed by the loss of their children to a school bus accident.
Concern: The Past: Everyone is haunted by the accident that took away their children.
Issue: Interdiction: Everyone wants to either find out what happened and prevent further accidents like the one that took away their children, or stop the lawsuit in its tracks and move on.
Problem: Desire: People are all haunted with a yearning to have their children back, or to get even with those who took their children away, or in the case of Nicole, get even with her father for robbing her of her innocence.
Solution: Ability: If they could, the townspeople would raise the dead. Only Nicole appears to succeed in hurting her father, but her success is tempered by her dependence on him.
Symptom: Inequity: Everyone is focused on the injustice and imbalance that losing their children brings to their lives.
Response: Equity: Everyone tries to remedy the situation by joining a lawsuit that will give them a sense of balance and justice.
Catalyst: Destiny: The premature demise of their children propels the story forward.
Inhibitor: Interpretation: The meaning each person puts on their loss slows the lawsuits down.
Benchmark: The Present: How many are signed up marks the progress of the lawsuit.
These are all a good start … but note that they’re just using the Appreciation as Storytelling rather than functioning as a true Appreciation.
In other words your encoding of an Interdiction Issue:
is certainly correct, but you haven’t written it as an Issue. How does Interdiction cause conflict in this story? How is it an Issue? This is the single biggest problem have with Dramatica both in analysis and creation (and it took me forever to finally get it), but you have to take the Appreciation’s function into consideration when doing these things.
How does the Situation cause conflict? Why does being haunted by an accident create conflict? You can’t assume because some could be quite content with being haunted.
If you can do one Throughline a night but encode them from the point-of-view of conflict that would be amazing!
The efforts by an out-of-town lawyer to intercede on behalf of a town dredges up old conflicts that pit a husband hotel owner against his wife … that would be an example of Interdiction as an Issue.
It’s a TON of work (but worth it in the end, especially on your own stuff)
Aha! Right! Thank you! I’ll rework the OS throughline tonight while taking your notes into consideration.
Again, THANK YOU!!!
So grateful you’re here, Jim. We love you! 
Could there be different views and/or guilts as to what could have caused and/or prevented it?
Yes. There are some scenes that address that concern.
Okay, I think this is about as far as I can take it. If someone can take over from here and run with it, that would be great. Otherwise, this is as good as it gets.
CHARACTER DYNAMICS
MC Resolve: Steadfast: Mitchell remains staunch in his quest to save his daughter and find the reason behind every tragedy. He never comes to accept that some things are simply accidents.
MC Growth: Stop: The audience is waiting for Mitchell to stop pursuing the class action lawsuit and upsetting the families of the victims.
MC Approach: Do-er: Mitchell goes door to door, soliciting the townspeople to join the lawsuit. He flies to wherever his daughter is to rescue her from her latest predicament.
MC Style: Linear: Mitchell works his way through the town one by one, soliciting each family to join the lawsuit. He also presents his case in a linear fashion, as with Wanda and Hartley he explains, “Someone calculated ahead of time what it would cost to sacrifice safety. It’s the darkest, most cynical thing to imagine, but it’s absolutely true. And now, it’s up to me to make them build that bus with an extra bolt, or add an extra yard of guard rail. It’s the only way we can ensure moral responsibility in this society. By what I do.”
PLOT DYNAMICS
Driver: Action: The bus accident sets the story in motion. During the investigation, the discoveries Mitchell makes regarding what happened constitute the act turns. The story ends with Nicole lying on the witness stand, destroying the lawsuit.
Limit: Optionlock: Nicole’s lie and the death of the class action lawsuit marks the climax of the story.
Outcome: Failure: The lawsuit falls apart.
Judgment: Bad: Mitchell remains haunted by the tragedies that surround him.
STATIC PLOT POINTS
Goal: The Past: Everyone in the story is trying to get over something that happened to them. The townspeople are either trying to get over the bus accident, or trying to make sense of it, or trying to profit from it. Mitchell’s focused on finding out who’s responsible and making that person, or company pay. Nicole is focused on getting even for her father’s abuse.
Consequences: Memories: Should they fail to win the lawsuit, the townspeople will be left with only the memories of their loved ones.
Cost: Developing a plan: The townspeople and Mitchell have to prepare for the hearing and go over what they’re going to say.
Dividends: Understanding: While Mitchell draws more and more people into the lawsuit, the Townspeople come face to face with who they really are.
Requirements: The Present: The lawsuit can only move forward if people are on board with it.
Prerequisites: Contemplation: Before signing on, the Townspeople understand none of them will get their children back and no one is going to go to jail. In the end, all they’re going to get is money.
Preconditions: Conceiving an Idea: Nicole states she won’t lie and Billy threatens to beat Mitchell so bad he’ll piss blood.
Forewarnings: Gathering Information: As Mitchell gathers information, evidence mounts that Dolores is to blame for the accident. Dolores’ memory is inaccurate (something on the road) and she was distracted, focusing a lot of her attention on the children in the back of the bus (she loved her kids), and not so much on her driving.
OVERALL STORY POINTS
Domain: Situation: A school bus accident robs the town of its children, leaving the townspeople vulnerable to lawyers who dream of striking it rich with class action lawsuits.
Concern: The Past: The lawsuits force the townspeople to relive the tragic event, preventing them from moving on, keeping them stuck in the past.
Issue: Interdiction: Despite already receiving an insurance settlement, the townspeople begin to feel entitled to more money. Meanwhile, others more aware of what’s really going on, alienate themselves from the community when they try to put an end to the lawsuits.
Problem: Desire: No longer satisfied with what they have and desperate to fill the void that their loss has left them with, the townspeople are stuck wanting more.
Solution: Ability: The only thing that can truly satisfy their desires would be if someone could raise the dead and bring their children back, but that’ll never happen.
Symptom: Inequity: The lawyers focus the townspeople attention on the injustice, the criminal negligence that robbed them of their children…
Response: Equity: …making them believe the only sensible thing they can do is join one (or more) of the lawsuits.
Catalyst: Destiny: Aimed at exposing those responsible, the lawsuit propels the townspeople toward a hearing they hope will eventually prevent other accidents.
Inhibitor: Interpretation: The varying interpretations of the event, from criminal negligence to random accident, slows the lawsuit down.
Benchmark: The Present: More and more families sign up for the lawsuit.
MAIN CHARACTER STORY POINTS
Domain: Activity: Mitchell flies across the country in a hopeless effort to save his daughter from whatever predicament she’s gotten herself into.
Concern: Understanding: Mitchell doesn’t know why his daughter keeps trying to destroy herself and struggles to figure out what he did wrong.
Issue: Interpretation: When Mitchell talks to his daughter, he’s never sure who he’s talking to; his daughter, or the drugs she’s on.
Problem: Chaos: Mitchell has no idea when his daughter will call, or what she’s doing, and it’s that Chaos that drives him forward.
Solution: Order: Mitchell could find peace if his daughter stopped destroying herself and behaved in a normal, orderly manner.
Symptom: Inequity: Mitchell worries it’s something he did, something he said that threw Zoe off course and onto a path of self-destruction.
Response: Equity: Mitchell does everything in his power to be a loving and tolerant father and always makes himself available for his daughter.
Unique Ability: Conditioning: Mitchell’s gotten so used to his daughter calling to reveal some devastating news it’s almost become second nature to him, he’s able to deal with everything she throws at him.
Critical Flaw: Interdiction: But no matter how hard Mitchell tries, no matter what he does, his daughter just keeps sinking back into her self-destructive patterns.
Benchmark: Gathering Information: As his daughter’s self-destructive path continues, he learns she’s contracted HIV and finally understand no matter what he does, he’ll never be able to save her.
INFLUENCE CHARACTER STORY POINTS
Domain: Manipulation: The townspeople struggle to come to terms with the school bus accident.
Concern: Developing a Plan: They try to imagine what their lives are going to be like now that they’ve all lost their children.
Issue: Circumstances: They try to make sense of what happened, looking for a reason, blaming each other for what any of them what have done wrong.
Problem: Desire: The townspeople want their children back, they want to go back to the way things were.
Solution: Ability: If they could raise the dead, they would, but they can’t go back in time.
Symptom: Speculation: Some of the townspeople start to form wild theories over what happened, looking for any excuse that could explain why the accident happened.
Response: Projection: Other townspeople worry if they continue with their witch hunt, it’ll tear their community apart.
Unique Ability: Sense of Self: Haunted with a deep sense of injustice, the townspeople look for someone to blame.
Critical Flaw: Suspicion: Many of the townspeople are aware of what’s happening to their community, that things will never go back to the way they were, no matter what.
Benchmark: Conceiving an Idea: Slowly, they develop a sense of what really happened on that fateful morning.
RELATIONSHIP STORY POINTS
Domain: Fixed Attitude: In a grief stricken town, Mitchell stirs up a range of dark emotions as he challenges the townspeople’s point of view on the school bus accident.
Concern: Memories: Mitchell forces them to relive painful memories as they recount the events leading up to the accident when most of them would rather forget.
Issue: Suspicion: As Mitchell gathers evidence from townspeople, Mitchell leads them to suspect that someone unknown is behind the accident.
Problem: Desire: Mitchell and the townspeople yearn for to make those responsible pay.
Solution: Ability: If they can find the culprit and make them pay, it might somehow, in part, make up for the loss of their children.
Symptom: Self Aware: Mitchell and the townspeople are painfully aware of their losses.
Response: Aware: Mitchell stirs feelings of outrage when he reveals that he suspects the accident was caused by someone, somewhere, making a decision to sacrifice safety in order to cut costs.
Catalyst: Falsehood: Mitchell urges the townspeople to act fast; if they don’t, the truth will be covered up and they’ll never get to know why the accident really happened.
Inhibitor: Circumstances: Mitchell and the townspeople are all aware, at some level, that their ulterior motive is a financial one.
Benchmark: Contemplation: Mitchell and the townspeople mull over their option and what it means to go to court with their class action lawsuit.