Encoding the Overall Story Points

writing
#1

I’m in the process of writing a story, and I think I’ve figured out what I want to do with it, and what I want the message to be. I have a storyform, and I’m liking what I’m seeing for the subjective throughlines so far. But I’m hitting a wall when it comes to the Overall Story.

The Overall Story is about a queen moonlighting as an assassin, with the help of a group of mercenaries. I want the source of conflict in the Overall Story to come from the queen having to keep up the ruse long enough to take out her targets without them catching on, so I chose an Overall Domain and Concern of Manipulation and Being. I’ve encoded the OS Story Points as follows:

  • Manipulation: The queen, her court, and the targets (who are visiting high-ranking officials) are all manipulating each other.
  • Being: The queen is pretending to like the targets in order to keep them from turning other countries against her own.
  • Thought: Everyone is trying to control or ascertain what others think of them.
  • Unending: Everyone’s problems stem from trying to continue a relationship with the targets’ organization because of their control over important trade routes.
  • Theory: Everyone thinks that the problem is that they need to create a theory for why the targets have died that is plausible enough to allow them to maintain their relationship with the organization.

The problem that I’m having is with the Response of Hunch. I’m not quite sure how to make that work. I’ve tried looking at the gists, but it still doesn’t make any sense to me.

The more that I look at it, though, the more I wonder if Being doesn’t work as a Concern for this story, and that’s why this Response isn’t working.

(Plus, I’m still having trouble with plotting stories with groups for the OS. I’m so used to writing stories about loner protagonists, which is part of the reason I’m trying to rewrite this one.)

I’d be happy to get some suggestions, or an alternate way of looking at it.

#2

Cool setup!

What would you say the Story Goal is? Does it have something to do with the assassinations and what they will accomplish? Or is it the assassinations themselves?

#3

I’ve been thinking about it, and I think I’m trying to make the story fit into the wrong storyform. Again.

The actual Story Goal would be getting vengeance (the visiting officials caused a massacre in the queendom). But I also want the queen to be personally focused on improving her skills as a fighter and magic user so that she can be the one to take the targets out instead of letting anyone else do.

This is the main issue that I have with trying to use Dramatica. I’m pretty sure it’s just a Me problem, but I struggle with connecting the Main Character to the Overall Story. That’s the issue that I’ve been having for months now with this story. In the original story, the Main Character is trying to avenge the massacred people while also hiding the fact that she is the rightful queen (even though someone else is sitting on the throne), and there isn’t really a group, so it seems like there’s no Overall Story. Plus, I can never seem to settle on a storyform that actually works for me and the story.

#4

Is it a short story? If it’s not a novel or novella, it’s quite possible that it’s not intended to be a full Grand Argument Story, and that’s totally cool.


http://storymind.com/dramatica/questions_and_answers/22.htm
#5

It’s a novel. I think I just need to get some distance from it so that I can look at it objectively.

#6

For some reason this reminds me of Shakespeare’s Twelfth Night, ninja stuff aside.

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#7

but

That sounds like a group to me. Plus if she’s hiding the fact that she’s the rightful queen, she must be hiding it from someone.

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#8

Hiding the fact that she is the rightful queen is most likely an MC Domain of Universe (hiding her true external label)
Avenging massacred people is most likely an OS Domain of Physics, though Psychology would be cool.

Need to know the IC and RS as well, so you’re not storyforming in a vacuum (which will result in you going around in circles)

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#9

This is a good point, and it actually got me thinking about the other characters in the story and how they would be affected by the massacre. And suddenly, I have a group. Woot!

Funny that you should mention that, because the IC and RS are where I’m having the most trouble. I keep thinking that there might be an IC handoff somewhere but, to be quite frank, I suck at writing characters. And I’ve only recently started to get a handle on Relationship Stories and what they’re actually supposed to be. Which explains a lot as to why I keep going back and forth with this story.

I’m trying to figure out what the two perspectives would be in the story (your Method for Generating Conflict article is a godsend in that regard). Hopefully that will point me in the right direction.

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#10

Okay, I think I figured it out.

The Overall Story is about a group of people who have all come together to figure out a way to avenge the massacred people without bringing down the wrath of the organization.

The Main Character is personally dealing with hiding her identity because she doesn’t believe she’d make a good queen - she’s spent her most of her life working as a mercenary. She also refuses to use the magic that marks her as the rightful queen because when she was a child, she panicked during an attack on her home, used her magic, and inadvertently caused the death of her family. So she believes that it’s best to stay hidden so that she isn’t put on the throne (because of tradition) and causes even more problems for the people as queen.

The Influence Character is a former teacher who has the ability to draw out people’s magic, but is now a disgraced war hero. In the story, he’s constantly pushing the MC’s buttons, pointing out all the ways in which she’s limiting herself in order to make other people comfortable. He, on the other hand, couldn’t care less and doesn’t let how people remember him stop him from doing what he’s set out to do, which is help the MC avenge the massacred people (and also protect her, because he knows who she is).

I think the relationship between them develops because of the focus on understanding the true nature of her magic, and what it actually does. The major events that build their relationship in the story all revolve around getting a better understanding of how her magic actually works.

I know that ‘Getting Revenge’ is generally an Obtaining thing, but I really like the idea of having the source of conflict being not just in getting revenge, but in the way they’re thinking about how to go about getting revenge. Mostly because I want the ending to revolve around them finally changing their way of thinking and cutting ties with the organization in a massive way, and the MC finally deciding to use her magic and reveal her identity (the original ending of the story.)

So… yeah… This is where I end up running into a wall most of the time. Because Getting Revenge seems to be mostly an Obtaining concern, but it feels like putting it in Conceptualizing would be a better fit when it comes to the other throughlines. And that’s before I even get into the other levels.

#11

I’m already sold. You have a knack for premise, that’s for sure.

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#12

Since martial arts and magic are a main part, it would make sense for it to be about conceptualizing which form and how to go about it being the main story, with the revenge the reason why.

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#13

If you can really state the goal as something like “figuring out how to cut ties with the organization”, and you (as Author) think that’s what determines success/failure of the overall story, then definitely Conceptualizing can work as the OS Goal & Concern.

The characters may be thinking about revenge for part or most of the story, but the characters don’t necessarily have to be aware of the Goal, as long as the Protagonist is still pursuing it in some way (and getting others to consider it).

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#14

This is excellent! That’s exactly what they’re doing, only they thinking about revenge. Awesome!

It’s so weird how something can be right in front of your face, but you don’t see it until someone else points it out.

Unfortunately, that leads me right back to my original problem of not knowing what to do with a response of Hunch in this regard. The only thing that I can think of is that, in response to trying to create a sound theory for the organization to accept regarding the officials’ deaths, they… ignore their gut feelings?

#15

Wait, I thought you were aiming for a Goal of Conceptualizing? That fits “figuring out” a lot better. (Hunch etc. fit under top-right Concern like Being)

#16

That’s right! I was thinking of my original post, when I was trying to make it fit under Being.

I need to keep my storyforms straight. :sweat_smile:

#17

:slight_smile: But it’s great that you’re trying different things and keeping an open mind!

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