Hey Billy, Thank you so much for your comment – It’s actually been quite eye-opening for me.
I found your vision of the story really funny, I could see that working well. However, it’s not quite the story I was going for, which I think is down to my explanations on things (the quote is really badly worded and even my example isn’t quite right haha).
I think it might help if I go into detail about the hipster’s control on the town, because I don’t think I’ve really explained that.
I do feel the understanding of the hipster set up will help with the MC through line.
I’m totally open in regards to the order of the quad – I just want to make sure it fits what I’m going for.
So in regards to the overall story, I’ll give a bit more detail. So it’s essentially a small town. These “hipsters’ have moved back from a big city (due to rent prices etc). They feel they have downgraded having to move to a small town. One way of dealing with the cognitive dissonance is to bring their big city ways with them and “upgraded” the town. There is definitely a sense that they are a higher class of person (in terms of culture etc) and look down on the town folk and think they know best – they will bring them up to their level.
They bring these new ideas but it’s a bit like a dictatorship. They own the café, the pub, the barber etc etc. In the café they only serve macadamia milk because almond milk ruins the coffee (a barista smugly said this to me once – true story). If you request another type of milk they make you feel stupid and inferior for even asking the question. Ends up getting to the point that people go along with it because they want to be seen as cultured and also don’t want to be made to feel stupid for liking almond milk. There is a sense of “these guys are from the city, I better conform to their ideas”. There are very little options in their establishments – the bar only serves craft beer, god help you if you ever request a Budweiser. We know the ways, come up to our level.
That’s essentially the set up, however, obviously some people are secretly dishearted by the hipsters but don’t have the guts to stand up to them in case they are publicly ridiculed. There will be people who don’t really want to be made fun of because they like fosters beer.
Then James, who has been ignored all his life, loses his eye. People start noticing him. People are curious about him, stare at him open mouthed when he passes, want to know what happened etc, look at him like he is a freak. I think there is real jealous from him. Everyone notices me because I’m a one-eyed freak, where the hipsters have got it lucky – they are good looking, cultured, talented (one’s a musician, one’s a street artist, and one’s a barista). Not only that, but they are also smug about it.
To deal with his newfound attention, he creates this persona I guess. He doesn’t want people to see him as a loser freak, so he puts on attitude in public (yeah I’ve only got one eye, deal with it). Badass. He would prefer people to think of him as a badass loner that does what he wants, than a clumsy ass one-eye freak.
He comes face to face with the barista hipsters, and his new persona takes over. He is no longer taken any more shit. He demands almond milk, the hipsters try to belittle him and refuses. He storms off, comes back 5 minutes later, he jumps behind the counter, makes the coffee himself, pours in the almond milk and struts off. He gets a shit load of positive attention, the first he has ever had.
He likes it. He realises that he if keeps playing this bad ass character and keeps taking down the hipsters the more positive attention he gets.
He has a lot of support at first, because what he is doing is perceived to be a good thing as he is standing up to the hipster, providing a platform for others to do the same, creating an environment where there is choice and you can do and say what you like without fear of ridicule.
However, because he is more motivated by bringing down the hipsters and making them feel as inferior as he does rather than being motivated to changing the town in a positive way, it means he does some really bold actions near the end that cause issues for the town.
In regards to James and hipsters. As mentioned before, I kinda see them both in the wrong and it would be best for them to both be a bit more open and work together to my the town a better place.
I guess in regards to the hipsters – it’s good to bring new ideas, but don’t be Nazis about it and belittle people who think differently.
To James – don’t reject new ideas just because they make you feel inferior.
I feel a bit more confident with this explanation.
In regard to the quad, how do you see the positions of the elements?
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